Before her fingers started to move on the keyboard to type, she stood for a few minutes in front of the mirror to look at herself. She wanted to interrogate her soul. No, she did not find any piece of selfishness or businessman who wants to buy everything with money. She tried hard to find out if she had fallen away from her father’s principles. She also tried hard to determine if she was still trying to find her brother or her lost love. She came down and caught sight of her father. She was still able to look directly into his eyes and said to him, “Yes, I am the same little girl who follows your principles, but I will not leave this legacy to my children. I hope you will forgive me.”
She looked deep into her soul and spoke to herself, “People will continue to judge others because they think of themselves. They care about themselves instead of others. Well, that’s their fundamental right, so I don’t mind. No, I don’t care what people say or think. “
Once she was upset because of her mother’s decision, one of her cousins said to her, “Munna, listen to everyone like a good child. But you do what your heart says.” Recalling his statement today, the real smile has brightened her face and eyes. She thought, “Well, I’m not the only stupid person on this planet. Many other super stupid people are still alive on this planet.”
This world is a kind of illusion. She thought, “Why would I search for a brother when my brother is alive on the other side of the fence? I got enough love from my parents and Chachu, which I continue to feel despite their deaths. Without my knowledge, my brother protected me but didn’t say a single word to take credit. When my so-called husband failed to protect me, my brother stopped people who were emotionally torturing me.”
She went deeply into her soul to find out about herself because recently, she has felt some changes in her mindset. Recently, she has started feeling satisfied. There are no impulsive or destructive thoughts left inside her. Of course, there is pain, but she has control over it. No, she has not forgotten him. He is still the love of her life. It would not be called the love of life if the person forgot his or her love. He lives like her shadow.
She always feels his presence around her. She remembers every moment they spent together. For example, she still remembers those moments while he was filling the gas tank. She adored him while looking through the window. They were on their way to Ladakh. He was busy checking the tires’ air before going higher up the mountain but she was busy adoring him.
She smiled at the victory: “The Almighty had sent him to stop my search and to provide me with lasting satisfaction through his love. I don’t have to search for love anymore. I don’t feel anymore that someone should come to love me. How I could feel that because he had already come to satisfy my mind and heart even though he shredded my soul in many pieces.”
She is pain-free now. She wonders why she doesn’t feel pain anymore. Why does it not hurt her anymore when so-called great people still try to hurt her? Whenever people try to insult or mock her, she never gets upset at all. She is in a feeling of peace and satisfaction because of his given love. That is the reason why she is pain-free. If someone attempted to insult or mock her two years ago, she could have ripped their soul out of their bodies.” Some people talk nonsense and bullshit. It is not their fault because they cannot think beyond their small heart and brain capacity. She smiles because she found peace and satisfaction without erasing his memories or hating him. No, she neither needs another lover nor brother because both are still alive on both sides of the defacto line. They were gone a long time ago, but she never left them. She is confident in her brother that if someone would attempt to threaten her security, definitely, he will come to save her again.
She smiled, looking at the sky, and said, “Isn’t this a co-incident? My brother’s name is also Abu, and he belongs to the same tribe. For my protection, is it possible for my Abu to be reborn?” She counted on her fingers about the days of Abu’s death and how old her brother is. Well, co-incidentally, this is the exact difference between Abu’s death and her brother’s birth. She does not believe in the rebirth cycle. Let them decide who believes what they want to believe.
She smiled and looked at her father again, “Mum and Chachu were in my dream today. Why didn’t you come with them? Hmm, father, it seems you are still busy dealing with the same old issues.”
“Love is not just what you think. It is rare and divine. She found her rare and divine love in this life. It does not matter whether we are together or far away; love remains the same. Does it matter if one forgets the love, but the other keeps it alive on behalf of both? The dead remain dead. Indeed, they come into our dreams to share moments of happiness. “