The Coldest, Saddest, and Darkest Winter (12/19/2018)

img_0585                                              Her shadow always along with her
Last year, she often walked into the parking lot, wearing just a cashmere sweater. She had walked outside without a winter coat or jacket or gloves or hat. This year, she feels freezing. Everybody predicts that this winter will be slightly harsh or colder than last year. But she disagrees with everybody’s prediction. She thinks the darkest, coldest and saddest winter was on Dec19, 2018.
On that day, she felt that his Bravo man had become very weak. She had felt fear in his eyes. He also had felt his love and caring behavior. He had also become deaf and blind that day. He could see the truth but was weak enough to accept it. Compare to him, and she was fragile and weak. It was hard for her to stand or walk, but the strange power inside her was helping her. It was the last day when he saw a helpless woman whom he loves a lot. The same woman was asking justice from him. He never saw his loving woman again. But, it was not the last day for her. Later, she saw him several times but from afar. How could she stay away from him? She is his shadow, or he is her shadow. Can you separate a shadow from the body?
His name or presence often had made her laugh from inside to outside. Most people would often say to her, ” when you talk about him, we can see your eyes smiling, and your face get brighter with the glow.”

Still, many people ask, “Why can’t you forget him? Try taking one step forward to move away from him.”
She has always given a response, “How can I do it. He is my shadow. Can I move without my shadow”.
She woke up after taking a nap. She saw a tall and white young man who has curly hair was staring at her. She asked the boy, “My bald boy has grown up a lot.”
The boy has a husky voice. After counting her medicine, the boy asked her, “Good! You start taking your medicine. Why didn’t you tell me about your recent visit to the hospital?”
She smiled and told the boy, “I didn’t want to disturb you. Susan always makes everything a big deal.”
The boy said, “Yes, Grandma was right that you are stubborn.”
The woman said, “Boy, your grandmother may be right, but I am trying to learn how to live independently. I don’t want to have any hope or expectation from anyone.”
Suddenly the boy became unhappy and asked him, “If you allow me, can I ask you something.”
She didn’t even allow him to ask anything, but he asked her, “Are you happy, mummy?”
She smiled, “Do you see tears in my eyes? Of course I’m happy.”
The boy is a genius, so he told his mother, “There is a difference between pretending to be happy and happy. Do you still love Altaf? Had you ever loved my father?”
The woman said to the boy, “Your father asked me the same question two days before he died. Have you ever been in love with me?” I asked him if he likes to hear the truth or he wants me to lie to him. Today, I have the same question for you. If you want to hear the truth or lie. ”
The boy is also stubborn like his mother, so he said, “No, I like to know the truth, and yes, I am your son and have the ability to bear the truth.
The woman said, “No, I never loved your father. The marriage was arranged, and he never gave me a chance to fall in love with him. Later, he fell in love with me, but it was too late. Yes, I still love Altaf. But whenever he comes into my dreams, I am disgusted. He was my first and last love. I know you grew up in Western society, and I was grown up in a different culture, so our view can be different on this topic.”
Mother and son were grown up together. The boy was witness to the physical and emotional abuse of his mother. She had refused to become a victim. Instead of it, she calls herself a survivor who later became a role model for the youths.
When the woman met the love of her life, the boy saw his mother the happy first time. The boy also saw his mother smiling from inside to outside. Unfortunately, the boy also saw his mother’s worse situation when his love was gone from her life. He saw how a strong woman sat on her knees after losing her love. The boy also becomes a witness to his mother’s mental breakdown. A woman with a strong personality has become the weakest person on the earth.
The woman was afraid that her bad luck could make his bald boy’s life miserable or make him q weaker boy. But she was wrong. After having a long conversation about the upside-down of their life, the woman realized that she had raised a gentleman who will never run away like a coward.
Suddenly, something weird came into her mind, “Boy, I want you to leave now. Please don’t come to revisit me. I will call you if I need anything from you.”
The boy said sadly, “if I need my mum, what I should do.”
The woman whispered, “It is the same time of year, the coldest, saddest, and darkest winter, which is not good. Go away, son.”
The woman becomes sad and confused again because she cannot decide whether she can’t separate from her shadow or this special day of the year is coldest, darkest, and saddest.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s