She was staring at him while lying on the bed. He was sitting on a chair by the window. He looked as calm and calm as if nothing had happened. She was in terrible condition, but she had faith in him. She had trusted him. She had loved him more than anything in this world. No, he had not come to wipe her tears, today. He was not there to support her. He was not there to save her. He had come to protect himself only. She could see the fear in his eyes. She used to read his heart and brain, sitting thousands of miles away. Today, she was not able to read anything. Her soul had not died yet. She had seen him after one month that day. She saw a helpless man sitting in front of her, who was convincing her to lie. Should she had lie or not spoken the truth? What could have been her life now if she had not spoken the truth that day? He still could have been in her life now. Then, how reality would have been come out?
She didn’t know who was the jury and who the judge was. She only knew that the man in uniform should have protected her. She did not know who had more courage. That day, she had often looked at his uniform which was decorated with many medals of bravery. The name on his uniform was attached to her before her birth. That day, the name of the tribe and his medals on the uniform had kept telling her, “look, he is just like your Abu. He would give his life but will protect her.” Now, she often shakes her head in confusion when she thinks about him and the real khan bravo.
Every person goes through a judgment day after the death, but her judgment day was today. She was delusional and paranoid so she was deniable to accept that a khan can never be a coward. They always keep their words and promises. They will fight with the bravery instead of running away.
It was the day when she was told the reason why her life or love is being taken away from her. The voice was very loud but having faith in him had made her deaf. The truth was very clear, but she could not see it because of her being blind in faith and love. That day, she was sitting alone next to him.
Fighting at every step of her life, she didn’t know who would help her. She used to expect help from them who wanted to destroy her. It was not her fault, either. She was born with bad karma which nobody could change it. He often told her, “have faith in me. I don’t believe in fate. I will make you happy, and I will change your fate.”
Now she laughs whenever someone tries to console her and advise her to have faith. Now, she never gets angry at anybody. She laughs at him. “Have you changed my life? Yes, you did.” The pain is always hidden in her laughter.
She was told, “love is divine. You are a very gentle lady. However, she was also told what people would think that a middle-aged top cop loves a non-Muslim woman. His family will disown him. His rank will be taken away from him. He would lose his job. He is stupid. Both of you are stupid because of being fallen in love.”
But she had given a lot of hugs, and her tears were wiped too. At that time, she was not aware of spending the rest of her life with tears.
Next Day, she saw him last time. He had hugged her and wiped her tears. Again, he was worried about her. With his hands, he had fed her. That day, the first time, he admitted that “yes, you love me more than I do.” He always used to tell her, no, I love you than you do”.
He told her that we would be back soon together. This was the day when he told her,” you didn’t do anything wrong. Why you have to ask sorry from your cousin or sister or anybody else?” At that time, he knew well that she had left everything for him.
After that day, he started to run away from her. He had hidden from her.
She learns everything quickly. Living with him for so many years, she also learned many things from him. Now it was her time to use those sources. She was looking for him while some bad people were hunting for her. He had many enemies. He had created many innocent people militants. At the same time, He got a death threat. She got busy saving his life while others were busy thinking,” who will be eligible for the govt benefits if he dies or gets killed by the militants.”
while helping others, her mind and heart had continued to break. Nobody had paid attention to her pain because she was nothing. Once again, she has become an orphan without him. He was everything to her. This was the time when she had become a real hunter. Only one person knew about this hunter, which she thoughts were one of them.
She was breaking badly. Now everyone knew about her condition, but nobody could do anything. She went everywhere, but all doors were shut down on her face. She got insulted, torched, and blackmailed. Some had given her a silent treatment. She was mentally torched under right his nose. Nobody cared about her. All her caring people live in heaven, so why would or who would. Now, she has shut all doors and windows herself.
Almost two years now, there is no single day in her life when she didn’t cry or think of him, but she never curses him. Everyone thought time would heal her. Maybe he thought the same. The time has failed to heal her. Both her mind and heart are getting numb and cold. She feels dejected.
Did he lose his job? Did his community has disowned him? Did he lose his promotion? What people say now after reading her stories. Not only a few people know, the entire world knows now. Yes, he has received a gallantry award. He got his promotion before time. He had given in situ promotion. She laughed when she came to knew about his promotion because he didn’t know yet.
He has lived. He didn’t die. People still salute him. How much respect he has on his back, people know well. He didn’t go to prison for corruption. Well, the list was good enough to blackmail her.
She had tried the last two years to wake him up. “You can wake up the dead person from his grave. Can you wake up the dead soul? No, you cannot.”
He is no longer lives in her brain, but she couldn’t take him out of her heart. Was she delusional, paranoid, or hallucinating before? or Does she now?
He stills lives in her heart. Now, she lives on his words, “if we don’t meet each other in this life physically, but nobody can separate our souls.”
She has given up hope, faith, and desires. Now she waits to reborn. She still sees him walking inside the home, sitting by the window, and reading the book. She sees him jumping around and laughing, which makes her smile.
Sometimes she thinks about if he was torched too. She thinks if he ever had felt bad. It isn’t good if her sources were right about how he is handling his pain. She can tell the entire world about her pain. Can he tell anybody about his pain? Maulana Ji said,” Men can take the pain and secret to their grave.” Well, men are not brave enough to face the truth. How much brave he felt when he went to receive his gallantry award? How does he feel when he looks at his mother’s chin? There are a lot of questions that come into her mind.
She knew well that her last hope was hopeless, but she still had tried. She is a fighter. She fights with her demons who live inside of her heart. Now she decides to live her life in a quiet place. She lost not only her life but also her faith in the khan tribe and in God.
She tells her beautiful Valley, “No, don’t call me again. I won’t come back to you.”
She heard mocking his valley, “You were born here, and you will die here too. You took your first breath here. You will take your last breath in my lap. The first time, you had opened your eyes here. Your eyes will shut off in my lap too. The only difference would be that your killer will stand in front of you when you say goodbye to me forever.”
She grabs her bag and smiles with her teary eyes. Again, nomadic life awaits her. Life without a destination is beyond that.
Who was the judge? where was the jury? If love is divine, what was the sin? Why her judgment day before the death?
Who was the judge? where was the jury? If love is divine, what was the sin? Why her judgment day before the death? She tells herself,” it was court without the judge and jury on the wrong judgment day. The real judge, jury, and judgment day will come.”