The seriousness of life cycle

A gentleman has asked me some beautiful questions. Do I pray or recite the Quran? Do I take my life cycle seriously?
No, I don’t take the life cycle seriously. My life cycle is not a combination of sorrow or happiness. Yes, once I took the life cycle seriously. I am trying to be positive even though I have lost faith and happiness in my life. My childhood was the best part of my life. Being an innocent or brat little girl, I had not taken my life seriously; no child takes his life seriously. However, remembering my childhood gives me a lot of happiness which gives me a smile. I have started to smile again, but inside I feel so scared. I was born a Sikh but reborn as a Muslim, which I was told. Three wonderful men had raised me. One of them was a Muslim who believed in Allah, and his name was Abu (my soldier boy), my father believed in humanity, and he was very spiritual, and my uncle (chachu) believed in Sikhism.

Three men had taught me something which has become my Quran now. I recite my Quran every day. I do have my version of the prayer, which I have made from the teaching of those three wonderful men. But, unfortunately, those three men went to live with the almighty when I was only 16. None of them forced me to choose any religion.

Now, my daily prayer includes, “Allah and Babaji, keep everyone (even the people who dislike me) happy, healthy, and prosperous. Bless me so I can work hard while keeping my humanity and honesty. Keep evils and demons away from me because they are scary. Give me a superpower to save the lives of others. Please slap my head right away if my actions will take me toward sin. Keep my spirits up to fight back and fight for those who cannot fight for themselves. Keep my bubby safe and healthy. Tell him Munna loves him. Don’t let me be a lazy person. My dear Babaji and Allah, stay inside of my heart. Don’t leave me. I don’t care if everyone leaves me alone, but you don’t leave me, please. I want to meet my bubby again. I want to live in the valley again. Can you be kind enough to give me strength and love, keep me honest, and make me brave? I do not want you to be uncomfortable, so I try my best to be a good person. I will talk to you again tomorrow, so wait for me. Your daughter: Sara Munna”.
This is my prayer and holy book. I am sure that someone will listen to my prayer. I want peace and love. I want people to be happy, healthy, honest, and hardworking.
Back in my life cycle, after my childhood, my life had made many cycles so quickly that I forgot to keep track. Honestly, those life cycles were so painful, and I don’t want even the wrong people in this universe to suffer like me.
Once, I was told that the almighty stretch the people to test their limits. If so, the Almighty has stretched me beyond those limits. This is the reason I always fight with the Almighty. Why did he stretch me more than others? But he also gives me the strength to get up and fight back. So that is why I get along with God. Similar to a good father, the almighty is always there. I went through hell in my life. My hell is on this earth, not after death.  However, I appreciate the Almighty for keeping me strong and honest. So I am his good daughter. Everyone has only one almighty, but I have all of them. This could be the reason that I am still alive.
Yes, I don’t go to Mosque because my bubby has left me on the doorsteps of the mosque. I refuse to go inside without him. I will wait for him to take me inside the mosque; otherwise, I won’t go. I don’t need to go inside the holy place because the Almighty resides in our hearts. Almighty lives in the heart of each living creature on this planet.

I took my life so seriously when the love of my life was with me. I had taken each step or dream seriously. I took even the fake promises seriously. I have taken it so seriously that it has shattered me into many pieces. I try to collect each piece, but I find his name written on every piece. I see his face on every broken piece of my soul. Do I hate him? No, never. He is the man who taught me to live again. He has made me feel that I am not an orphan. He has loved me enough. He has brought my life back. He has given me many years of happiness. For me, he is everything to me. I feel like an orphan again since he is gone.

People always advise me to move forward. He often asked me why we met. It is a soul connection that never breaks. It was the desire of the almighty. Now, this life is hell without him.
In 2 hrs, my life cycle changed dramatically because I had spoken the truth.
Only a few people had heard my screaming. So many people in this world are witnesses to reality, but everyone except a few has shown a blindside.

Now, I don’t take my life seriously. I laugh when someone tries to talk with me about faith or love. The woman who lived her entire life in the cave lives outside now, struggling to laugh or smile. I don’t live to see the future. I live each minute.

In the past, I had spoken with my heart and had paid the price, but it has not stopped me from speaking the voice of my heart.
I believe in the Almighty. I will continue to recite my version of the Quran. I will wait for him to take me back to my valley. Otherwise, I will think my life cycle is permanent at the stop sign. I could not live in happiness, but I will try to make everyone happy and smile. This is a hell of a cycle in my life. I am still excited to live in this hell because I am afraid to see another version of hell. Yes, I won’t take my life cycle seriously. Why?

People have raised many questions from time to time. Can anybody give me a better version of prayer? People asked me why I didn’t cover my hair. Why have I adopted western life? Some people have told me, “You have become a part of the uncivilized world. I tell those people, “seriously, look inside yourself. Covering your head or body won’t make you a good person while your soul is naked. What would your prayer do if you didn’t hesitate to kill someone’s soul for your greed?

This uncivilized country is my safe house. I feel safe. Nobody judges me in this country. The strangers have supported me. My body is recovering from injuries, but my soul will always stay wounded. I want everybody to be happy and in peace. Almighty will always stay with you if we don’t harm others. I can’t do good, but I try my best not to hurt anybody. My best friend is my almighty and my bubby, but I am a friend of everyone. Yes, I do get upset. I often cry and scream. I fight with the almighty, but we are friends again at the end of the day.
I like talking to knowledgeable and wise people because I want to learn, which helps me improve. Yes, I often get weak. Sometimes, I feel alone. But I express my feelings through my words. This blog is the only option left for me to communicate with my loved ones.
Thank you.
Sara Munna.

2 thoughts on “The seriousness of life cycle

  1. Jesus gave a sample form of prayer. It’s called the Lord’s Prayer, but probably should be called the People’s Prayer. It begins with honoring God and praying for His will to unfold; moves on to a request for the needs of the day, a plea for forgiveness and a commitment to forgiving others, and a plea for deliverance/protection from evil. It wraps up with honoring God as who He is once more. 🙂 Blessings!

    Liked by 1 person

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