Daily Journal: Day 3

A year ago, on 12/16/2018, she had reached Delhi to save somebody. The person was a house prisoner. His passport was taken away. His cell phones were taken away. His media accounts and emails were also highjacked. She felt that he is in prison and in deep trouble. She was so weak. It was hard for her to keep her head straight. Her neck was not supporting her head due to injury. She was so weak because she was not eating or drinking for the past couple of weeks. However, it was her responsibility to save and protect him. The promise is a promise that is why she went to the Valley again. It should be another way around. He should be protecting her but he did not have the courage to do so. Both her mind and body were weak. She was so fragile but she had to go to protect her love because it was everything to her. 

A year later, today, she has sat next to the window on the recliner. She must support her neck; otherwise, she won’t able to sit for longer. She does not know herself if she is crying or laughing. The tears are in her eyes. The strange smile is also on her face. Today, she is trying to protect her memory and trying to do her brain train exercises such as playing chess, solitaires and typing speeding tests. Yesterday her performance was better but today she is having a hard time concentrating on her daily brain train exercises. 

She looks outside. It is a cold winter day. There is no sunlight. The sky is covered with clouds. The devils and demons have covered her luck/fate. She refuses to bring her tears out of her eyes.

The recliner is new which is her early x-mas gift. She thinks in her mind, “is it my time to confine to the recliner? or Am I too young to sit it on this recliner? Why it has given to me? Does my family think that both my mind and body will be paralyzed at the same time?. No, I should not depends on anybody. I will continue to fight with my demons and devils”.  

She thinks, “Yes, I did not backstab anybody, but I was stupid and was blind in love. well, people could love the wrong person. It could not be changed when you love somebody. It won’t call love if it is changed. I wonder why I don’t change because I have loved him. I love his soul”.

This is the point where she gets confused. Her definition of love is connection of souls which nothing could break. Does she wrong defining it? Should she change with the flow?

No, she should follow what is written in above image.

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